Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Top Ten Signs You're Not Ready to Have Another Baby.

Now that Tori’s reaching the one year mark, the questions are beginning again. Whether it takes the form of a casual, “so, do you think you guys are going to have another,” or the much pushier, “you know, you really should think about giving her a sibling,” everyone wants to know.

When am I going to pop out another baby?

My first reaction is usually “none of your business, damn it.” But really? I have no idea. We’re certainly not ready yet. And here are ten reasons why:

 I still haven’t lost the last 15 pregnancy pounds. And yes, in my world, doing so is a necessity. I want to be a MILF, damn it.

Getting out the door with one kid is still a challenge. She fights me tooth and nail while I dress her. Then she screams and arches her back as I try to put her in her car seat. Then, when I finally get her harnessed in, she poops. And the cycle begins again. Add in the search for the diaper bag and my car keys, and we’re always at least 30 minutes late.

I’m not done sleeping yet. Once I got preggers, I never managed another eight solid hours of sleep. First it was the constant peeing. Then, the insomnia hit. Then the joints started aching. And then, of course, I had a newborn. So yeah, I’d like to appreciate my pillow for a while longer yet.

I haven't forgotten how much being pregnant sucks. Sure it's a magical time filled with beauty and wonder. It's also nine months full of ever expanding body parts, constant exhaustion and  extreme indigestion.

Our love life hasn't recovered from the first one yet. And that's all I'm going to say about that (my mom reads this, yo).

I haven't forgotten how much maternity  jeans suck. I never found a pair that would stay up. Ever. So I was constantly waddling around, holding on to the waistband, hoping to keep the crotch from ending up at my knees.

Formula is expensive. Sure, if I had another kid I'd try to breastfeed again, but given my resounding failure with Tori, I don't hold out much hope. I'm looking forward to not having to spend 30 bucks a week on glorified powdered milk for a while (mama needs some new shoes).

I haven't figured out the whole work/baby/life balance yet. I'm told it's possible to stop feeling like you're constantly behind in every aspect of your life, but I'm not sure I believe it. Until I figure it out (or find proof that everybody's lying), I'm not ready to add more chaos to my household.

I really enjoy wine. And lattes. I missed both terribly while on the baby making journey, and I'm not quite ready to say good bye again.

I'm not ready to surrender to the minivan. In my mind, I still drive my little blue convertible. I don't think my psyche could take the transition to family hauler.

So there they are. My top ten reasons I'm not ready to have another baby just yet. What about you guys? How did/will you know when you're ready to try again?

Don't forget to visit Oh Amanda for the other Top Ten entries!


  1. LOVE this list! :) How great! I should make a list like this for my son. He is three and thinks that babies get into womens bellys because they eat them, and then they come out a door. His ideas not mine! :)

    Loving your blog! Looking forward to getting to know you!

  2. i'm not going to lie--two kids is waaay harder than one. we are never on time...for anything. ever.

  3. Great list. I agree with all except the minivan one because I have wanted a minivan for a long time (I don't know why!) I will know I am ready for another one when I forget that children whine (which will be a while considering my youngest is still a baby and my other is a toddler)

  4. It's the mini-van that keeps me from the third. *sigh*


  5. What a funny post--I loved it! That is exactly how I felt when my first was around a year old. It wasn't until he was two that I would even consider giving him a sibling. (And this is from someone who always wanted four kids!)

    Now, I have three, my last is 6 months old. I think you just know when you're ready. And the "it's none of your business" answer is perfectly fine for those who hound you about it in the meantime!

    Oh, and the minivan isn't THAT bad...although I will say my next vehicle will be one of those SUV-type thingies that seats as many as a minivan but looks much cooler! (Hey, I might be 40, but I'm not dead yet...)

  6. cracking up!! love it!!!! sooooo true!

  7. The wine and lattes are the hardest for me too. I love me some wine on the weekend.

    Aren't those questions rude though? I hate when people as me that.

  8. Great list. So many people I know just up and got pregnant the 2nd time without seeming to think about it . . . it took me awhile to consider the second one.

  9. I STILL haven't lost my baby weigh. And my child is 8.5. And no, not months-that would be years.

  10. Ugh - your list really hit home! We're celebrating birthday #1 next month, and planning on trying to conceive again around the same time. I have SUCH mixed feelings! I want the kids to be close in age, and I want to get the baby stage over with, but TWO babies!?!? Eek!!! However, with my treasured rum-and-diet-Coke in hand at the moment, I'm thinking another few months of nights like this might be nice... :o)

  11. I have a nine year old, a three year old and a one year old. I just know I'm done, and it's a great feeling. I can just enjoy the littleness, and look forward to the bit where it gets easier (I hope!)

  12. these are too funny! Some of them I relate to and some are things that will go away or you will forget in time (like the maternity jeans, I had forgotten how crappy most of them are until 9 months ago!! lol)

    How great of you to know that you are not ready yet- I was the same way and didn't begin to feel ready to even think about the possibility until my daughter was 2 or 2.5! You'll know!! :)

  13. Yes, why can't they make a pair of maternity jeans that don't fall down to your ankles?? And as for the minivan? I'm about to pop out number three and am still fighting it. Three kids squished in the back of a Subaru? You better believe it.

    (Visiting from Seven Clown Circus. Nice to meet you!)


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